Well ok. So this happened……
I would love to tell you it was a great story. Dancing on the tables until midnight. Falling from a great height whilst climbing a mountain. Or during a daredevil stunt on skis. But no, it wasn’t any of those things. In fact it’s ironic really (and no not in the Alanis Morissette way) that i broke my ankle in the most un-elegant and un-dramatic fashion whilst turning a corner in – the office – i still cant believe it happened that way! All i can assume is that I turned the corner too quickly. I heard a crack and promptly fell to the floor.
I was quickly surrounded by twenty curiously concerned colleagues who thankfully didn’t choose to follow a career in the medical profession. The generous prognosis was ‘don’t worry its just twisted’ and ‘if its swollen its not broken’. Don’t you just love the wise medical diagnosis from the masses? I guess I have google to thank for that.
Anyway turns out I was not so lucky and it is in fact broken. So i am learning how to hop around on my crutches like a drunken kangaroo on one leg. You know i’d always seen teenagers flying around on crutches like it was no big deal, a rite of passage even, only for the brave and fearless. I on the other hand struggle to make it anywhere further than 100m, and don’t ask me about finding the co-ordination for making a cup of coffee……..
All of this happened of course when my beloved was away on a business trip. He rushed home and the first stop he made was at the medical supply shop where he picked up my new chariot!
Ladies, never, ever underestimate the usefulness of a practical man!!
Now we are free to exit the house, stroll (wheel) around the city to enjoy a refreshing aperitivo (spritz with lots of ice please) and even take our first road-trip adventure on crutches! Forget the dozen red roses….. this I tell you is true romance!!
The first night we escaped the four walls of the apartment, was into the sticky, humid sauna like air (no that’s being too kind, saunas have DRY heat, turkish bath would be more accurate) of a typical summer Modena evening. It felt so liberating to be out of the house and seeing people! My knight in shining armour wheeled me around in my chariot and all was going well until the thunderstorm arrived. Yes. Thunderstorm. Now normally this is a blessing and we yearn for the skies to rain to clear the air and make the city more tolerable. That all changes when you are in a plaster cast 20 mins away from home! We were on hold with the taxi for an age, only to be finally told ‘we can’t find any’. Plan B? Well we waited until the rain eased just enough to be able to make a not so speedy dash for home. Improvising the worlds most genius rain cover for my cast. You guessed it, the ever versatile black plastic bin bag wins again. With a good helping of sticky tape!
When it’s 40 degrees and rising outside, it can get a little uncomfortable at the best of time. Now as I have this new fashion accessory attached to my leg for a wonderful 35 days, there is a new meaning to the word.
Firstly after a week, my leg muscles have got a bit weaker and the cast feels heavier and heavier every day. It’s nicely padded for comfort inside, but its like having a lead soled Ugg boot attached to your leg at all times. Cosy it isn’t. Mean temperature inside the cast? I shudder to think. But I’m probably slow cooking my leg……. so at the end of the month a will if nothing else have a nice juicy Irish leg to eat with my mashed potatoes and mint sauce!
The heat has one other draw back. Swelling of all limbs in general. My toes turned blue the other day, yeah and they were a bit tingly. Just like when you wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweaty panic with a dead arm. You all know the feeling. After a quick check at the hospital, where the amazing doctors of Modena’s Policlinico assured me it’s not serious enough for amputation. I returned home with the strict instructions to keep the leg – often – above my heart level to help the blood run back to the heart. Apparently blood circulation is a bit lazy when the leg is snuggled nicely in a cast.
I’ll keep you posted on my one legged adventures over the next weeks!
That reminds me, I must stay out of the sun as torturous as it is this month. Otherwise I will end up turning a nice golden brown all over …..and when the cast comes off??? Hairy albino Gorilla leg is haunting my dreams!!